Necessary Mutilation

Weight: 199.5 lbs.!!!

I did it!! I am really finally under 200! I knew all along this was coming soon…LOL!! Not! Really though, I knew yesterday that I was losing…I could feel it. Seriously! As I have begun to feel less achey and miserable, I have felt my metabolism kick back in, rather like a furnace reignighting I can’t describe it, but its like a wierd, inflammatory process had gotten a grip on me the last week or so, and I have felt it starting to dissipate, and be replaced by energy, enthusiasm, health and balance. I have experienced such strange, nebulous, passing changes before, and do wonder in hindsight if it is related to hormones or inflammation from arthiritis or something.

Although I may never be sure, my weight loss to me, is also proof that the malaise has passed, and my body is resuming a degree of normalcy (for me, anyway!)I can actually feel the difference, and even all yesterday, I just knew that I was losing once again. Has anyone else ever experienced the feeling of being so in tune with your system, that you can tell when you’re losing, or at least when your metabolism or whatever, has resumed working?

Well, whatever it is or is called, I am feeling more empowered and vigorous too. Last night, Tom and I ran off to Slots in Fort Erie to play, as neither of us could resist the compulsion to let our hair down in this way. This too was good for me, in the sense that it was a nice diversion from everything real (which is usually the point of gambling!). Unfortunately, it wasn’t as good for us financially, although not that horrible either, as we budgeted just a little and played long and hard on this amount before giving it over to them altogether.

Today we are off soon to an estate sale, a chinese auction and other events at a Ukrainian church, errands, dinner with Charlie and Nancy, and then a play (”Falsettos”) with them afterwards. This should keep us hopping! I have picked a Greek restaurant for us to hopefully all enjoy, and as it is just minutes from the theater, this should help with our tight schedules, too.

Tomorrow we are having our now monthly brunch here, and our friend, Dorothy, is even coming in from Rochester to spend the day, and join in the fun. She is one of four friends due, so it should be interesting. Especially as our kitchen is small, and we only have seating for 5! And all the spare tables have been commandeered to the garage for the upcoming sale!

Well, as can be seen, I am coming out of my funk in every way, and once again starting to enjoy and take part in life around me (non grudgingly). I sure hope this and the weight loss that accompanies it, lasts, and that I never see the 200’s again! But, given my history of fluctuation and such, I will not say never, and if I’m truly not done hovering, I hope to at least have the proper attitude and fortitude in place now, to handle this better. And for anyone else out there feeling stuck or discouraged, I hope that seeing me finally “move” and feel better, will inspire and encourage you too!!