Necessary Mutilation

Weight: 224 lbs.

As almost expected this time, my weight has crept up slightly. In addition to eating too much and some wrong things in the last few days, I suspect that I am bloated as the big “P” is nearing. The only good thing about this is that it may explain my grumpiness of late…or at least I’d like to blame it on this.

Today I did start back up with my exercise routine, and I am sore from head to toe. I haven’t bumped my routine up yet, and have made a decision to go a little easy on myself until I am back in the swing and stop hurting so much.

It has been a huge relief to be off today, and has allowed me to catch up on laundry and other long overdue domestic tasks and other stuff that has been set aside due to all the “playing” we have been up to. Tonight we do have plans to return to the casino for our usual Monday double points day, and hopefully will win enough to finance our habits for the rest of this week. As I’m sure you all know, the pre-holiday time period can be more expensive, and it sure would be nice to pad our pockets with some extras for this time frame.

Last night, long lost friend Rose left a voice message asking if we could get together for our big reunion, some weekend in December. I consulted our calendar, and was shocked to see that nearly every day has something in it already, from Christmas parties to concerts to benefits. I actually left her a message back today, asking if we could hold off until January so we can enjoy catching up after 20 years, rather than have it feel like a hurried and squished procedure. This seems so rude, but I don’t want to schedule another “obligation” that will simply add to my stress and anxiety level at this time of year and as I still await the likely start of the new job. I tend to eat more and worse in response to chronic activity and too hectic of a pace, and I MUST leave time and space for all the everyday things like exercise, decorating, gift wrapping and the likes.

Ack - I can feel my stress level rising just writing this! Yours too now, I bet! Sorry!

Also, I hope to leave time for our everyday friends, for Christmas gatherings, catch-up and gift giving. I feel as if this is a new, bright year for me, and that I have arisen from the ashes of last holiday season, when I almost felt dead already due to the physical and emotional toll that my weight had taken. I really hope to do the things that I couldn’t in past years, including really enjoy the simple activities that others likely take for granted, including decorating and getting out for all that the season has to offer.

Well, I must get more done today before Tom returns from work and we fly out to Seneca for dinner and slots. I will try to chose more carefully from the buffet you know that we will eat, and be disciplined in every way. I’ll be sure to tell all in tomorrow’s post, so if I do fall off any of my many addiction wagons, you’ll be the first to know!

Echhh - wish me luck!