Necessary Mutilation

Weight: 247.5 lbs.

I am getting depressed. Not only am I holding steady at a higher weight than I was some days ago, but I just looked back over some pics of me both before surgery and now and, although I’m somewhat smaller now, I realize that I still look like a beached whale! Just when will I look even remotely unfat — as in my weight isn’t the first thing people are likely to notice about me when I walk into a room?

I am also feeling that “bald” is probably the only other adjective that people may use to describe me these days. I’d love to think that someday others may refer to me as effusive, friendly, warm, engaging, pleasant, or funny before they note: “fat” (or “bald”). Now I am likely to be descibed, if someone is focusing on my personality, as jovial (as in the heavy butler), jolly (as in Santa Claus), or good-natured (as in the plump and pleasant child).

(Others may prefer stubborn, obsessive, porky, and controlling at times, but that’s another subject!)

Continue reading “Thar She Blows!”