Necessary Mutilation

Well, I followed up with my friend Janet about her “attitude” when I told her, and she was shocked and surprised to think that she had said such things or that I had taken them this way.  She was open to talking it all through, apologized and admitted that she does have a tendency to say things in an off putting manner — including to her sister who is ill with cancer and probably experiences her as I did but with increased frequency.

In fact Janet took such heed and was so apologetic and expressed such gratitude at my caring message, that I ended up feeling somewhat badly for any pain I may have caused HER!  I also feel badly knowing that she is often overwhelmed with responsibilities to her sister, her job and her 2 big dogs; and struggles to keep up with everything on her plate as a single woman.

I knew though that the air needed to be cleared and that I could count on her to take heed so as “not to inadvertently alienate loved ones”.

We “hugged” (on the phone) and it was all good - and to me it is the best friendship when 2 people can be this honest and receptive and give and get feedback without worry over ruining the relationship.

We made plans to get together soon and enjoy one another’s company in a renewed way, and I trust that this is just what will happen.