Necessary Mutilation

All right — this one is downright hysterical.  So last night, rather than stare at each other in Barb’s and Rick’s absence, Tom and I invited my longtime size-zero friend Debbie over to stare at both of us instead.  She is wonderful hang-loose company - you know, the kind with whom you can just watch TV, talk, snack, and vegetate.  In fact, this has always been our favorite thing to do together, aside from travel in my younger, heartier single days when she and I used to do everything together.  Now she is more like “Jackie” on the Roseanne show - blending in with Roseanne’s and Dan’s everyday routine, comfortable and familiar.

In any case, she was (of course) one of the first friends I’d told of my surgical plan.  Although I thought I had explained somewhat what surgery entailed and eagerly shared what I was learning about various aspects of the process, I guess I’d never given her a quiz (like the one I’d had to take on-line!) to be sure she “got” it.  So, here we are talking late last night about future plans, hopes, expectations, etc., and somehow she mentions her belief that I am likely to be much thinner soon.  It takes me some time to understand and absorb what she was saying - only to realize that she actually believes that this bariatric process is going to unencumber me of my weight while on the operating table!  I still can’t quite imagine exactly how (I think she’s been watching too much Sci Fi TV!), or just what she thought I’d come out of the O.R. looking like - but, COOL!

I was never so sorry to have to burst anyone’s bubble in my life!